I am writing on Sunday. It is nearly noon. Around 5:00 a.m. this morning I woke and downloaded this week’s On Being episode. Krista Tippette, the host, interviewed the artist who called herself a maker, Ann Hamilton. Wikipedia tells us about Mrs. Hamilton.
Ann Hamilton (born June 22, 1956 in Lima, Ohio) is a visual artist known for large-scale multi-media installations, as well as her work in video, sculpture, photography, textile art, and printmaking. Wikipedia
Although I can easily be awed in an almost worshipful way by some of the creations of Mrs. Hamilton, such as the enormous pieces of fabric under which are many wooden swings or the sculptures she makes from books or the pages of a book, I am most humbled when she says that perhaps the most important question is “How can we be together?” As in the quoted conversations below, whether she is talking about her experience with her grandmother or the courage to be present as the project (art piece) determines its own form and essence, she invites us to explore ways of being present with our own body as it welcome or rejects it second skin, clothing, and with each other.
MS. HAMILTON (on her experience with her grandmother): I was very close with my grandmother. And you know, I have really distinct bodily memories of sitting next to her on the couch. You know, when you’re little and you kind of get in that space under her arm and her arms were full. And, we would knit, or needlepoint, and she would read. And I think there’s something about the rhythm of the hands being busy and then your body falls open to absorb and concentrate on what you’re listening to, but not completely, because you have two concentrations. And then from that, that sort of cultivates a kind of attention. That is the rhythm of those two things together. So the unfolding of the voice in space, and then the material accreting under your hand, and they have really different satisfactions. You know, you can see the material, and...
MS. HAMILTON (on the courage to be present as the project (art piece) determines its own form and essence : That, when you’re making something, you don’t know what it is for a really long time. So, you have to kind of cultivate the space around you, where you can trust the thing that you can’t name. And, if you feel a little bit insecure, or somebody questions you, or you need to know what it is, then what happens is you give that thing that you’re trying to listen to away, and so how do you kind of cultivate a space that allows you to dwell in that — not knowing, really. That is actually really smart. And can become really articulate. But, you know, like the thread has to come out, and it comes out at its own pace.
She excludes a courage, which we would do well to aspire to; the courage to allow her life, her love, her knitting, or a large installation piece to become what it must.
It seems to me that whether we are an artist, an architect, a writer, a composer, a dancer, or an inventor, the challenge is to get out of the way and allow, as she says, the process to unfold.
It seems that many of we humans have a strong need or desire to hold tight to the illusion of control. Yet, we know, that as is true for every person who uses the 12- step program to reclaim their life, that we must constantly engage with the process of step 1 of the 12 steps. To wit:
We admitted we were powerless over our addiction – that our lives had become unmanageable.
Anyone who continues to work on recovery/spiritual growth will begin to come to the realization that step 1 has to be applied to all of life. We are powerless over our partner, our children, the internet company, the power company, what our car decides to do, etc. Despite our clear resolve to hold on to the illusion that we are in control of something, we are constantly reminded that we in fact powerless - except our willingness to be open to the unknown – to that which we cannot control
As with Mrs. Hamilton, we are constantly laying the groundwork - gathering the materials, preparing the space – for the birth of this new creation which will determine its own path. Those of us who are parents of children now grown are very familiar with this process even if we have not quite mastered the art of acceptance of having no control.
So it is that the hand must be free to reach out, to touch, to love, to embrace, to sit beside, to, in the words of Mrs. Hamilton, “ I think one of the questions that are [sic] behind a lot of the things I’m working on is where is it that we can gather and kind of be alone together?”
I am often reminded of the phase “reading separate books together.” I am not sure who first coined this phrase but it seems to have reserved a space in my memory bank when I was a very young child. Perhaps that is accurate. Perhaps it is not. I know that there is a comfort for me in being with someone who enjoyed reading as much as I do and is content with an occasional touching with a hand, voice, eyes, or the smile on one’s lips. I guess I am saying that I treasure the opportunity of being with someone without the need to deny our common essence while, at the same time, not meshing into the other person. I do not want to become Mrs. Hamilton. I would love to spend time with her and to delight in the unfolding of a potential friendship or perhaps just a loving co-existence – reading separate books together.
Suddenly the work of the choreographer George Balanchine comes to mine. What I also remember most about his marvelous creations are the hands of the dancers, which seem to take on an existence almost separate from the body. In fact, occasionally, I have seen a production in which the lighting is such that all you see are the hands doing this expansive, graceful reaching out, pulling in, connecting and disconnecting.
The trick is, of course, to now take this dance from the stage to the borders between countries or communities or groups in the same country – to reach across that vast abyss where each inch is a mile – to allow our hands to do what they do best – to reach, to caress, to greet, to let go, to love.
This we can do.
Written November 22, 2015 #2
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